


not quite forgiveness

by thebaldunicorn



Category: RWBY
Genre: Forgiveness, Gen, Or not, Oscar gets to rest a little, Ozpin centric, Spoilers: Volume 8 (RWBY), Volume 8 episode 12 spoilers, just a bit, no ships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-19
Updated: 2021-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-28 02:35:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30132699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebaldunicorn/pseuds/thebaldunicorn
Summary: Not everything gets forgiven. Not yet.Or, Ozpin takes over for a bit while Oscar rests. Post 8x12 spoilers.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 50





	not quite forgiveness

**Author's Note:**

> No beta for this. Apologies for any mistakes!

Oscar doesn't make it to Vaccuo.

He barely makes it to the CCT network failing, and to the first appearance of one of the portals.

Even with his aura boosted back into existence by Jaune and even with most of his wounds tended to by Klein, Oscar is far past exhaustion. He's wiped out.

He holds his own admirably during the battle against James. Now, Oz steps in as Oscar fights and loses to a third yawn.

_Oscar, you ought to rest_. He tells him. _You are understandably tired still. If you would like, I could take charge for a little while._

The others poke their heads through one of Ambrosius's created doorways as Oscar mulls over the offer.

He yawns again, which seems to seal the deal.

_You need to wake me up if anything new goes wrong._ Oscar says sternly. _Or if the plan changes, or Salem attacks, or, or_ -

_I promise. I'll rouse you if and when something happens_. Oz swears. He shouldn't smile, but there's a mental feeling of Oscar getting comfortable as he says,

_Okay. You'd better_.

Then Oz is blinking and standing and controlling a massively exhausted physical body. Oscar's body is small, much smaller than Ozpin's form, but it feels heavy, cumbersome, and worn down by the day's events.

In their mind, he senses Oscar settling down, curling in slightly. It does something to Oz's heart. He hasn't been able to protect Oscar from anything today. He's never been able to protect Oscar from anything.

Yet in this moment, for just a few minutes, he can give the boy some respite. That will need to be enough.

"Yeah, they're in there. I-it must have worked." Jaune is saying. "Come on, let's go."

Nora rushes in first, of course. Ren is not far behind, then Jaune, then Emerald. Emerald sighs, a wary look on her face.

"My day keeps getting weirder." She mutters as she sort of gingerly steps through the portal.

Oz goes in last. It takes him a few seconds to adjust to controlling their body. It's been a bit. They are so sore, he has to remember their hurts and how to move to aggrevate them the least.

Though to be honest everything is much, much better than it was only a couple of hours ago.

Oz blinks and finds himself standing in a space that could not possibly exist in Remnant. Other than black nothingness, the only other feature of the space is golden walkways leading to more and more portals. They must have been able to convince Ambrosius to create another extra dimensional space like the vaults. Oz wonders how much convincing that took.

He does not regret not having to speak to that particular spirit again.

Ahead of him, the team have already found Ruby and are talking animatedly with her. Ahead of _them_ , crowds of people are stumbling hesitantly through, then being herded around by various Happy Huntresses.

The plan is progressing quite well then.

As Oz nears the group, something must be showing on his face, because Jaune turns away, ignoring Ren still speaking to Ruby, to ask him,

"Oscar? You okay?"

"Hmm? We're fine, Mr. Arc." Oz tells him, trying for a small smile. "Oscar's simply resting for a moment."

Something tenses in them all to know he is in control rather than Oscar, but it is very small. He is hopeful they will work past this in the future. He is hopeful he can earn back their trust soon.

He has had a lot of hope lately, and he knows it is almost completely due to Oscar.

"It appears things with Ambrosius went well." He says, turning to Ruby. 

Ruby shrugs at him.

"I mean, I think so? Penny's fine, and people have been coming through from Atlas and Mantle just fine, so - I don't want to jinx us, but so far so good."

"Let's just hope it stays that way." Ren mutters.

Nora elbows him. Gently.

"It's gonna work. Have some faith."

"I'll admit, I'm surprised he didn't fight you on anything." Ozpin comments, resting hands on his cane. He's tired too, and the cane helps him stand upright.

"In my experience, Ambrosius delights in poking holes in other people's creations. If he is not sufficiently interested in the request, he tends to make his own fun somehow."

"Well..." Ruby glances away for a moment. "He did - he did give us this one really dire warning. He said - not to fall off? A-and he said it in this super serious tone. I...it sounded bad."

Oz gazes out at the space, particularly at the void stretching impossibly wide beneath the golden walkways.

"That's - ominous." Jaune says.

"Well he could have included guardrails or something," Nora grumbles. "If falling off is that bad."

Not a terrible point. Although, if not specified, there's no real reason for the spirit to take initiative and create more than is asked.

"Do you know what he meant by that, Professor?" Ruby asks.

Oz frowns, tapping a finger against the handle of the cane.

"I'm not sure. Creating spaces such as these are not safe, I know that much. To become lost in them would be - ill-advised. They do not have ends, Miss Rose. I do not think there would be any coming back. Ever." 

Everyone looks grim at his words.

"So we should definitely watch our step." Ruby says slowly.

Oz nods.

"Definitely."

"Everyone knows. We did warn them already, but - we'll be extra careful." That's a promise Oz doesn't know that Ruby can keep. He knows she will try, however, and he reminds himself to stop underestimating her abilities. Oscar would too if he were conscious.

Jaune nods, inching closer to the middle of the walkway as he says,

"Okay. What can we do to help?"

"You could ask May if she needs help getting everybody from the crater in here, or you can check in with -" Ruby stops dead.

There's an immediate reaction that has Oz reaching for his magic, because her face goes pale and her eyes gleam with tears.

She looks wrecked.

She makes a terrible, terrible noise, and then she's shouting and exploding into rose petals, careless of the warning they just discussed. 

"Ruby!"

"Miss Rose!"

"Is she okay?" 

Then Oz hears a different voice shouting her name, and he quiets the magic and panic inside him.

"Ruby!!"

"Uncle Qrow!"

He knows who that is.

He knows why she looked like that.

From across the way, their group begins walking towards the scene. Qrow burst out of one of the portals to the left, maybe a hundred feet ahead, and Ruby is already over there hugging him as tight as possible. Even from this far away, Oz can see how her feet have left the ground; he can see Qrow crying too; and he looks away, even as they approach, because that scene is not meant for him.

Oz....has not yet apologized to Qrow. Oz hasn't spoken to Qrow in a long, long time.

Oz doesn't think Qrow would want to talk to him. Not now, maybe not ever.

For a brief moment, he regrets asking Oscar to rest. He regrets that he will need to face this very soon and see exactly the pain and anger he's caused his old friend.

Then he catches sight of Emerald hanging back too. 

"I uh - they probably don't need me for this." She mumbles at Oz. 

It's true. Neither of them belong in this moment. Yang has joined the hug, and some of the happy Huntresses are tackling Robyn at Qrow's side. Everyone is smiling and laughing and crying and back together, and they do not need Oz or Emerald to jump in and ruin it for them.

That's alright. Oz understands.

"You did very well today." He feels the need to tell her, standing side by side with her as they wait away from the group. "We could not have taken down Ironwood without your help."

She gives him a tiny smile.

"I guess you couldn't, huh."

He tries to return it, lips ticking upwards - it feels as rusty as hers. Something about that makes it mean more.

"I'm glad you're with us." He says, honest.

"..thanks, old man. For what it's worth - I uh - I'm sorry. Or whatever."

He turns to look at her. In Oscar's body, he is shorter than her, and has to look up. She's not looking back. Her shoulders are tense and hunched, and her gaze is fixed downwards.

Truly apologetic then.

There's a lot she could be apologizing for.

"What are you sorry for?" He asks, for clarification.

"Um. All of it, I guess? I mean, isn't it partly my fault you died at Beacon?" She says.

That's the last thing he expected.

"I mean, I know Cinder did it. But I helped. I - I framed Yang, and got that robot girl torn apart, and caused all that panic that led to the grimm invasion. It's not all on me, but - I am sorry it all happened. I'm sorry I did that."

Oz stays silent for a moment.

"Thank you." He says eventually. "I can't offer you forgiveness for what happened to Beacon. That affected so many, in so many different ways. That - that is not up to me alone. As for what happened to _me_ at Beacon -"

He offers her another smile, slightly better than the last. Practice makes perfect, perhaps.

"I forgive you. I'm still here, Emerald. For good or ill, I always come back."

She lets out a relieved sigh. Her hands, previously wrapped around her middle, fall to her sides.

"....just like she does." Emerald mutters, contemplative. She doesn't look quite as tense anymore, though. 

"Hmm. We do seem to mirror one another, don't we?" Oz muses. He's long since accepted that.

He wishes -

He wishes things were different, between him and Salem, but he is not holding his breath. He knows what she has become, what she desires, and he does not want to share in any part of it. One way or another, he'll find a way to stop her. He has to.

"Do - do you think she's back yet?" Emerald asks him next. It's not often Oz is struck by their age anymore, well-adjusted to it all as he is, but her voice -

It sounds so small. It sounds vunerable. It sounds childish, for a second.

Oz knows he is wrong to put so much on people so young.

He knows that in many ways, Hazel was right. He's asking children to fight a war. It's necessary - they would be caught up in the crossfire with or without training, so why not train them - but it is not kind.

Gazing at her now, he sees how Emerald is still a child. Still young. Perhaps eighteen at most.

That's - that's nothing. Oz can't even recall being so young himself. (Maybe himself as just Ozpin at eighteen, but he'd started hearing a voice in his head then, and after that, age always feels distant and inconsequential)

It makes him want to reach out a hand and comfort her, despite knowing all that she's done. Despite the many mistakes this woman has made.

"Yes. I do believe she's reformed." He says, slowly. "However, she's lost her whale and much of her grimm forces. She may very well attempt to stop and regroup before resuming her attack on the kingdom. In which case, we will all be long gone by the time that happens."

"I hope so." Emerald says. She bites her lip, glancing at him then away again.

There's more on her mind. There's more on everyone's mind.

Oz takes a second to wonder if he ought to be helping somewhere - he looks back over at their friends, allies, and teams reuniting, and sees they are fine. The happy Huntresses are directing people through the appropriate portals, even people he recognizes as Atlas citizens, better dressed and slightly less frazzled. No one is violent. No one shouts or protests.

If anything, most people are either terrified or resigned as they trudge forwards.

They just want to feel safe again.

He blinks back when he hears Emerald comment,

"For the record, you're not how she said you'd be."

Oz tilts his head to the side curiously. 

"How so?"

Salem could have told her people many things. She could have told them lies, or even truths, or a mixture of the two, and he would not have looked good to anyone. Salem knows more of his secrets and sins than any other being on Remnant aside from Jinn, and, very soon now, Oscar Pine.

"...you're not as petty." Emerald says. "Or manipulative."

Oz gazes down at the cane. He hums a little as he thinks.

"I have been. I can be. You are not the only one here who has made mistakes, Emerald, and I have been making them for a very, very long time."

"I guess I'm in good company then." She says. She says it warmer than she's said anything to him yet - and the smallest laugh escapes him at her words.

Oz can't recall the last time he laughed.

It's been a very long time.

_Oz_? A voice whispers sleepily. 

Oscar must be waking up.

_Nothing has happened_. He says in a calm, quiet voice. _Everyone is fine. People are being evacuated from Atlas as fast as possible. Everything is going well and you haven't missed anything. Don't worry._

_We're good?_ Oscar checks.

_We're good_. Oz agrees. _If_ _you'd like to rest a little more, now is a prime opportunity_.

"Are you talking to the kid?"

"Hmm?" Oz blinks to find Emerald peering close, an odd look on her face.

"Yes, actually. He's waking up. How could you tell?"

She nods a little to herself.

"Your eyes kinda glow when you do that. Not much," she hurries to add, like she knows what he's about to say. "But they do light up. It's easier to see when everything else is so dark."

"Interesting. I....usually do not look at my own eyes. I didn't realize they spark with magic just from us speaking to one another."

"Two souls. Pretty crazy." She pauses. It's like the crazy has begun to fall off her like water. "Hey. Is - is the kid okay? You said he was waking up. He's not like....he's alright, right?"

_M'fine. Tell her I'm fine_. Oscar still sounds weary. He does the mental equivalent of stretching, sort of extending his consciousness in the mind scape. 

_Would you like to switch back?_ Oz asks. 

Oscar thinks about it. He's tired, but he doesn't know if he can get back to sleep. 

He wants to try, though.

_No, not yet._ Oscar says eventually. _Soon, I think. But maybe not yet._

"He says he's fine." Oz tells Emerald. "Simply tired."

_If everything's okay, I think...I think I_ will _rest_ _some more_. Oscar tells him. There's no need for yawning, when you don't have a body, but that is the feeling Oscar projects - an idle exhaustion and a clear sign of sleepiness.

Oz feels his lips curl upwards. His chest feels warm.

_Of course, Oscar. Rest. I will alert you if anything happens_.

"Finally. I think they're almost done." Emerald says, rolling her eyes.

With a blink, Oz realizes she's talking about Ruby and Qrow and the others reuniting. 

Ruby has stepped back from her bear tackle of her uncle and is wiping tears from her face. Some of the others have composed themselves further, seemingly discussing new developments and more of the business side of things by their postures and expressions.

Oz shouldn't put this off. There's no need to intrude but - but Jaune, Ren, and Nora are headed towards May, two walkways down, and Weiss is checking on Winter, who just stepped out of a portal, and Blake and Yang are catching Maria as she goes by, then directing Pietro by her side to go see Penny. They are dispersing. They are doing their jobs as huntsmen and Huntresses. 

He's proud of them. He's scared of what he knows he needs to do next.

"I have another apology to make." He says to Emerald. She seems the most comfortable around him so far (mostly Oscar, to be fair, but him too). Unfortunately, he needs to do this. He needs to leave her.

"Before I go, I simply wanted to say..." He hesitates. His voice goes soft, and almost cracks as he says,

"I used to love Salem."

Emerald's eyes go wide, her mouth dropping open as her gaze flies to his.

"W-what?"

"I tell you this," he continues. "Because I need you to know that I understand what it's like to love someone. I know what it is to love someone dangerous and cruel and terrible. I know....I know that you can't always choose who you love, or choose what they turn into."

She swallows, a scowl threatening to break across her face.

Neither of them say Cinder's name. It hangs in the air anyway, like an unspoken threat.

"However, you can choose when to walk away. You can choose to leave."

A tiny flinch ripples across her form.

"I don't - listen, I'm here. I already left Salem, okay? Y-you were there."

"I wasn't talking about Salem." He takes a step away, then another. "There are better people in this world who will care about you, Emerald. I promise. You don't have to wait around for someone who never will." He turns, one last time, to offer her a smile. "Think about it, alright?"

"Hmph. Whatever."

Her eyes sparkle with unshed tears.

Oz gives her a nod, then continues walking away.

Loyalty is a funny thing. Salem never had Emerald's, that much is clear. She had Emerald's terror and more than that she had Emerald's care for Cinder.

That....Oz can't tell if that's changed. Emerald doesn't like Salem, she doesn't want Salem to win, and she doesn't want the world to end. Would all of that falter, should Cinder show up again?

Would she try to get Cinder to come with them?

Would she fight Cinder if she had to?

Oz gets the feeling that Emerald herself has no answers to these questions, and it concerns him. They are likely to see Cinder again. If not here, in Vaccuo eventually.

When that happens, Emerald will need to have some sort of answer.

....

There is no sensation that makes him feel like an old man quite like striding onwards with his cane in hand. It is familiar - one foot, move cane, other foot - and it is comforting. He doesn't always love to be an old man, but he remembers the feeling well.

It's who he is inside, anyway.

Eventually, Oz walks in-between the crowd of people and makes it over to another platform. Most people are pouring out of the other portals - this platform has on it currently only two figures. Ruby Rose and Qrow Branwen.

Against his will, Oz hesitates, feet still. He taps his finger against the handle of the cane for a moment, stalling.

Then Qrow catches sight of him.

Ten, maybe fifteen feet between them.

Oz sighs, and walks that much further, knowing there is no getting out of this. He doesn't deserve to get out of this. If everyone else deserved an apology for his actions after Jinn, then Qrow deserves two or three.

He isn't sure what gives it away. Due to the merge, Oscar has picked up many of his postures and mannerisms, so it isn't the cane and it isn't the way he moves.

Yet, Qrow knows.

"Ozpin." He says, gruffly, as Oz approaches.

Oz stops, in front of them. Ruby looks nervous too.

"Hello, Qrow." He says softly. "I'm - I'm glad you're alright."

"I don't think any of us are alright." Qrow snaps. Then he sighs. "But hey, we're still alive. That's gotta count for something, right? Man, Oz, you picked a hell of a time to come back."

Oz holds himself as tall as he can, hands folded on top of his cane. Perhaps if he stands still and breathes, he can remain calm. It worked for the last apology. 

"Oscar needed me."

Ruby gives him a side-eye glance. He can't interpret quite what it means, but it isn't altogether positive.

"I'm sorry, Qrow." He says. Because he is. He's sorry he hurt one of his oldest friends with his mistrust and paranoia. He's sorrier that it was almost justified - because it isn't. It can't be. That's not fair.

If he believes in humanity and free choice as much as he monologues about it, he should have expended that choice to Qrow. He should have trusted him.

He tells the man that.

"I should have trusted you. I know that I can't undo what I've done and I can't take back my many, many mistakes, but - you deserved the entire truth. It was...cowardly to run when you found it. I'm - I'm sorry."

Qrow just looks at him. He just stares, silently.

There are dark circles under his eyes, and a haggard look to his face. Worse than that is this bitter, blank emotion reflected in his eyes. Oz doesn't know what has happened to Qrow today, or yesterday - he's not sure if even Ruby knows - but it has broken him a little. That much he can see.

Something terrible occured to him. Setting related to him being arrested and put in jail, perhaps.

Yet, that isn't for Oz to know anymore, is it? Qrow still doesn't say anything and that almost stings worse than if the man had punched him again.

There doesn't seem to be anything Qrow wants to say.

As much as it hurts, that's fair. Apologies are not sincere if your only goal is to gain forgiveness.

Qrow does not owe him that.

"Alright." Oz nods, in the awkward silence. Ruby, still there, shifts awkwardly too. "That is all I wanted to say. I apologize for my actions. I - I will go now. See if I can't help the others."

Qrow lets him. Oz gets three, four, five steps away before he finally hears his friend's voice.

"I don't forgive you, Oz."

Oz stops, his hand tightening on the cane.

"I don't forgive you and I don't know if I ever will. But there's bigger things happening than just you or me. So fine. Whatever. We're doing what we can to stop Salem. If you can help with that, we'll let you know."

Inhaling slowly, Oz turns around, gives Qrow a deep nod.

And then he continues walking away.

It is not forgiveness, nor is it the true acceptence he received from Ruby and the others.

But it is a start.

And at this point, Oz will take what he can get.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I don't know what this mess is?? I just get the urge to write RWBY fics the day before a new episode comes out. 
> 
> Look for the record, Ozpin had reasons for not telling the group the truth. But they deserved to know what the odds were before they joined his war. Plus, Oz ran away and hid for like an entire season. If he hadn't, there is a chance they could have worked it out AND come up with a new game plan for Salem. A small chance, but still. He left.
> 
> They might have overreacted in response, but they deserve an apology. And I do think Qrow and everyone will get there in terms of forgiveness, if team RWBY isn't halfway there already. Qrow's just had a very rough season.
> 
> Side note, Ozpin refers to himself as 'Oz' in this because he's Oz and Ozma and everyone in-between. He has all the memories and is Ozpin, but also more? Idk, I dunno how to articulate it.
> 
> Thanks for reading my nonsense! Comment if you feel like it!!


End file.
